They don't need to be hyponized to be unwise.

True buddies don't calculate the time or occasions of when you called or met up. They care about initiative but do not have any hesitations with making one and not get fed up.

They watch you grow and are genuinely glad to see you succeed. They do not have to appear at all but they are always there, especially in times of need.

But that 'they' has gone close to rest because of the minority they have become. It's always a pity to see what you thought was one, oh how easily one fades to none.

The Lie In The Truth.

Galileo Galeli said: "Truth is not found behind a man's reputation. Truth appears only when the answers to questions are searched out by a free mind. This is not the easy path in life but it is the most rewarding." Relate this to your learning experience in RP.

As I interpret the meaning from this amazing man’s phase about reputation and pre-judgement, I found a deep relation to it. As it does not only apply to RP as a school but to the external world we live in as a whole. Unaccountably many or most of us fall into the judgemental and superficial world we simply create and build boundaries to.

I understand how the truth is not found behind a man’s reputation is simply because the reputation can be self created and self imagined. For example in class, a seemingly outstanding student may boast of what he/she had achieved, earned or bought. That self proclaim creation may likely make up initial thoughts and images towards others. Therefore, the other people affected or blinded to see the real he/she will simply believe and create a self claim reputation about that person, but how true and how real is that student who boast will lay unknown unless they become relatively closer as friends. Taking the same example to give meaning to the second sentence, would be having a free mind in which then we only can find the truth. I fail to misunderstand this line because it is so very true. It is only with a free mind that we can find the optimum or whole truth. I would have a different perception of the “boastful” student if I have yet to meet him/her or missed out on the brags about his/her achievements and what not. From there, having the opportunity to know nothing about that person will in turn allow me to treat him/her as a normal student or classmate. From there getting to know the person without prior knowledge will enable me to know him/her better.

Apart from school life in RP where is happens ever so often, it can be seen from an example of buying a car. Cheery QQ is apparently known as a cheap and low performance car, made in cheap labour, China. Having known this, would I bother going to the show room of it or easily made my way to an awesomely proclaimed, BMW which is known to provide priceless performance? But assuming I did not know anything about Cheery QQ (“free mind”) in the first place and have not created any prior perception about the car, I might find that the car is simply a very practical, affordably priced, safe and has the ability to perform moderately well; I may not even consider to look into other made cars and the money saved from not buying an overpriced car can go into investments for houses. – Simply applying or swapping the example of cars to human, people, we would be most rewarded with unexpected appreciation, (“most rewarding but not an easy path.”)

Therefore, in all, I seek to walk in that uneasy path to find what is most rewarding and have the feel of positive unexpected outcome. Free the mind from judging others easily by having no resistance to solely wanting to know more about the person personally first. Because people tend to lose friendships, miss great opportunities to create various bonds such as relationships and friendships, spend unwisely and a whole lot more due to the un-free mind we mistakenly create and provoke.

Remember, it's you who's pussy.

Soles that gives you wings.

Washing clean and new hopes.

The Singapore GP was awesome once again. Singapore staged a pretty good show once again. As for the race itself, it was filled with drama and a few entertaining moments but it was a Lewis-all the way race, I would say. Red Bull was who I was supporting. Toyota made a name and Alonso made a slient come back despite the crashes made during trial and 3rd lap fall out from his team mate.

Had a good night with my mum during the first night of the race. It was my second time and it was her first and I bet she enjoyed most parts of it. We thank Sin Yee baby girl and her friend, Ashely for the passes. Neat.

Alphabet soup.

Having had a few conversations lately about relationships, I've decided just to throw some thoughts, views and feelings down into this digital form. To really begin off, I will like to just shout out to my girlfriend. All these are besides my mum of course, as both ladies know me excellently well.

Since it's more a boy-girl relationship, I want to extend gratitude to my girlfriend who has always been there for me. Right now, we stand closely to a 2 year long relationship and trust me, commonly or most first 2 years can already pack in some complex feelings, odd moments, selfishness, ungrateful times, taking one for granted, future, money and family issues and actually, loads more.

I affirm Sin Yee simply because; she is one whom I can easily relate to and vice versa. She has also been a little of an angel; to guide me, support and hear me out. To lend her shoulders and ears throughout and also recently (which is in terms of months which passed not too long ago), to my complains in my own "negative" world, my trust and my people issues and so on. I guess at some point she's totally bored out with what I have to say. For the recent times, I haven't been placing much time for her, be it having my own things to do, being tired, lazy and just simply not wanting to get up to chat or meet. For not making half or even sometimes, one quarter the calls every day and/or night. For reminding me to keep myself on my feet and move on with things and for being understanding for whatever position I am in for example, being caught between friends and family with her. For making me breakfast without fail daily for school, not being tired out like how I have become, taking a step forward just to bring our relationship to another month, most importantly with real love and concerns.

I feel sad sometimes when I know I can do so much but somehow choose to do so little. I really want to make things move on and work out better each time. As time is already catching up so fast I must make moves which I will feel proud of and not sit back and wallow in sorrow situations. I guess sometimes I have to apologies for my outburst of hurtful sayings, though some I meant and some I was ranting and some are just my “at the moment” feelings that I needed to let out and since it has already been said for example, I told her and probably gave her feelings that if I am single it might be better and marriage is not what I wanted. In addition, asked her to find other guys, if I am wasting her time and some other relatively hurtful things. (Well if some of my readers do not feel me or think it's just over sensitive or whatsoever, this are true feelings and I didn’t meant the post to be a debatable one, just so you know if you have left any judgemental feelings or thoughts here or in your head.) In the shoes of someone whom you genuinely love and care for, what I have said is pretty unfair and I on my part am not making things easier.

The difficulty level of placing everything down in words is high but in relationships it is a must for it to be two sided. The core reason, of course is love. But the feelings, the majestic word, the actions and the thoughts of love has to be divided. Divided into many different situations and in order for love to sustain, it should pass every test, big or small. We must know love can wear out; it has the capability to find something or someone to re-ignite, regroup some sort of its synergy to be whole again. Now different situations means the paths that we take, the paves that we make and the situations we so happen to fall into. Those situations will test the stability of love in every couple.

It's funny what the wants and needs are at the beginning of the relationship can change along the way, well of course things will change but the main objectives shouldn't. For me, I let my insecurities bite me, eat into me till I sometimes take it for granted, leave it to my partner to work on, being afraid of comments or judgements by others which I don't usually care or bother but somehow it can come around and it affects me. What affects me will affect my actions and therefore, a chain reaction takes position. Occasionally and commonly is also the lack of something to spice up the relationship. Many would of course be attracted to the other half in many ways than one and for most young and bursting with hormones couples would tend to find one another to fulfil fun, needs and wants. As they go along, the fun, needs and wants can change be it the lack of attraction like how a magnet can lose its force or the need for someone new and even the different wants and needs as the relationship grows older or a better way to put it, matures. All of these affect the input and the output of creating strong bonds.

It's also problematic as the relationship matures, we sort to know each other well, taking each other more for granted, knowing how the other will react, their weaknesses and their strengths. Sometimes it is for the better and sometimes it is for the worst. Many relationships fail because the strengths collide with one another and in some cases, weaknesses used against each other. For whatever the fall of relationships in these cases ends up pretty nasty.

What I guess I have been saying for me personally, is that relationships must be two sided, being understanding and the usual brags about staying faithful and other no brainer kind of values couples must have - is not simply simple.

My relationship is not stronger or weaker than any other simply because mine can't be compared to others and others can't be compared to mine, both are in good ways. Everything that love bonds and forms between two individuals are unique and amazing in their shining own way. But what is wrong is to choose to do less rather than doing what one can to the fullest. To not let others limit the way you are treating each other, to pass less or better, no judgement on others and to have little or no judgement onto ourselves. Though the latter cannot be controlled, we have to take it easy and do what makes your lover and you proud and happy. Just by doing that it will make the judges go crazy, fill with angst and envy.

Well, I am not going to change overnight to the prince of love to my lover, but I just want to say how grateful I am to have such a girl with little or no demands for material things, no high and unreasonable expectations, truly being there through the thick and thin so far, the maturity, the capability of hers to keep clam and to see through the good of people despite the bad in them, her credibility to remain faithful in this relationship with me though there are so many out there better than me and for those who are on standby to take her as soon as I go, for a whole personality so far despite the irritate able times and misunderstandings. Your goodness shines through and most importantly, I see and realize it. I love you baby girl, Sin Yee.

Spit the thought and it gets worst than you thought.